Whoops!

It wasn't just that the accuser and his family turned out to be a bunch or liars. It wasn't just that the evidence against him had been, in my opinion, illegally obtained and presented. I think the main determining factor in this entire $4million mess was the attitude of Tom Sneddon, the D.A. He turned out to be an arrogant, swaggering, incompetent gas bag with a definite axe to grind with Jackson. People want their public servants to present at least a facade of humility. Remember that Jackson is Not Guilty, as I predicted in a previous blog. We have judged him and found him so. As in the O.J. Simpson case, the talking heads will debate his innocence for years to come. As far as I'm concerned, the debate was over when the jury published their verdict. Do I agree with the verdict? It doesn't matter. I wasn't on the jury. Let it go.

Well, so much for me being a genius electronics tech. My wife fixed our air conditioner by making a couple of simple adjustments on the control panel, thereby saving us several hundred dollars in repair costs. I completely over-complicated the whole debacle, thereby leading to troubleshooting failure. Now, she gets to point and laugh at me while I hang my head in shame. Rats!!

Once again the weather has taken a turn for the better. It was 95 yesterday and will be 95 today. I refuse to proclaim that summer has arrived. The last couple of times I did that we were subjected to an immediate cold spell. Maybe summer is here, maybe not.

The Arubans are still piddling around with the case of the missing high school girl. The only way to get them off the dime is to pass up an Aruban vacation. Pick another island.

The recipe will have to wait. It is 7 AM. Too early to cook.

Stabbed in the Back!!!

So, the infamous Mr. Felt turns out to be deepthroat. Some may hail him as a hero, but if you think about it for a minute, you'll see that he was just a snake in the grass. He betrayed the confidence of his boss, Richard Nixon, and brought him down with the help of a couple of hack reporters. While it is true that Nixon was doing some things that were wrong, he never broke a confidence with his trusted aides and even defended the miserable Mr. Felt! Felt should have handled the situation through the specified channels. Instead, he went crying to the most left wing newspaper in the country and stabbed Nixon squarely in the back. Think of how you would feel if one of your trusted friends blabbed your shared confidences to the media. You may say he's a hero. I say he is just a low-life, blithering, back stabber. Now he has come forward because he is broke. I hope he winds up on the streets and eats cat food.

Going to Aruba? Why? Until the government of Aruba starts indicting people, there is no reason to go there. There is no reason to allow your children to go there. They haven't found a body yet, but saddly, they probably will soon. My solution, as always, is direct and physical. If the government of Aruba doesn't get off the dime and get on with it, we should place the island off-limits to American citizens. A few weeks of eating sand and rocks will bring results. I have no patience with diplomacy or incompetence.

Warm weather has once again returned to Delano. I know that the weather gods are trying to kill me. Hot one minute. Cold the next. Leads to pneumonia in old farts like me.

After several weeks of driving myself further over the borders of sanity, I have finally solved the video problem I was having with AIM. No, I didn't buy another camera. As I suspected all along, there were a couple of software switches in the computer. So you see, sometimes hardheaded obstinence pays off.

Danica Patrick is doing great on the IRL circuit. She is currently #10 over all. This is unheard of in a rookie. You will see her win a race before the season is over. All that skill and a babe to boot!! Don't bother to wrap it, I'll eat it here!

Which brings us to the recipe for the blog. Hot weather demands girlcicles! Here's how:

Find a small to medium size girl.
Get some ice cubes from the freezer.
Rub the cubes on the girl and lick the resultant water off immediately.
If the girl struggles or tries to back down, just wave a credit card at her. ENJOY!!

My sweet little wifey and I are looking forward to summer time. It's going to be great!!!

My Uncle Hugh up in Fresno is undergoing heart surgery tomorrow to repair a faulty valve. Say a little prayer for him, even if you don't pray much.

And so it goes.

KAPLUNK!!!!!

As I predicted a few blogs ago, Howard Dean, you remember the moron who self-destructed on national TV, is now leading the Democrats directly into oblivion. I knew it was a gross error to appoint this clown to head the democratic party and he is living up to all my expectations. He is going to create a major political crisis in this country because under his leadership, the democrats will not only fail miserably in the next election, the whole damned party may be destroyed and sink into the sea of imbicility. The major political crisis comes when the country outside of the Republicans searches for a replacement. It is essential to have opposition in this country's politics. While the democrats have provided years of jovial entertainment, they have recently become obstructionistic in their habits. We need to move on to a higher level of opposition. My favorite is the Libertarians. We'll see. In the meantime, say a litttle prayer for Dean as he stands on the deck of the ship he is sinking.

The Delano weather report: It sucks!! Once again the temperature has plummeted under 70 degrees. Who needs that? In June? In southern Calfornia? BOOOO!!

As usual during weather crises, I am thinking once again about selling out and moving north. Yes, I know it is cooler up there, but at least they have good fishing. If I must suffer through the cold, I should have a fishing rod clutched in my paw.

I'm still having problems with my webcam, proving once again that I'm not as smart as I think I am. My buddy over on the east coast thinks I should buy a new camera. He's probably right, but in addition to abject stupidity, I have a head as hard as a brick. Another week or so of failure should be enough to convince me.

Have you heard about the imminent publication of a book about the wretched Hillary Clinton? I have read a few excerpts from it and my opinion is that it will completely destroy her bid for the Presidency. This will be a good thing. I have suspected she was a crook since her days with slick willy. When all these newly uncovered facts are made public, the sun will set on her parade and if we are lucky, we'll never hear from her again.

And now for the recipe, ice box pizza:
Squash a couple of tubes of biscuit dough into a rough circle.
In your refridgerator, select all the items that have been in there for months.
If it's green, it'll be good whether it's cheese or meat.
Pour half a bottle of catsup on your squashed dough .
Chop 8 jalopena peppers and throw them into the catsup.
Dump all those ymmy items from the refridgerator on top.
Bake at 450 degrees for 20 minutes, ignoring any smoke coming from your oven.
Eat hearty!!! Ciao.

Almost there

The trial of the king of pop is coming to an end. Is he innocent or guilty? Who cares? The only thing that is important is that all the media feeding frenzy will be over. The tv talking heads are all a-twitter about this trial. Now, they are each forming an opinion as to how the trial went, what could have gone better, what could have gone worse and every one of them has an opinion about guilt or innocence. I don't think that this herd of moronic gas bags has one single ounce of sense, altogether. That bunch of bench warming idiots has no say in the matter at all. The only thing that matters is the verdict of the jury.

I finally got off my lazy butt and went swimming. It wore my fat ass out. I haven't worked that hard since last year. The water was perfect except for the frogs. I evicted about 50 of the slimy little creatures. Only after I released them into the flower beds did I realize they would have been great bait! Oh, well. I am sure they will be back. You can't keep a good frog down. If any of you ladies are having bad luck with your room mates, I'll be happy to sell you a frog, suitable for kissing. Your prince may be inside.

If I didn't live in the boundaries of the ninth circuit court of appeals, it would be hard to understand the total incompetence of the Florida courts. The people of Florida should seriously consider throwing all those bums out. Unfortunately, those of us in California are stuck with the ninth circuit court. They are a bunch of communist assholes who are legislating from the bench. How can we handle something like that?

The recipe for today is elepant soup:
Dice one large elepant.
Slice 3 or 4 carrots and an onion.
Cover with gnu stock.
Cook over low heat for 5 days.
If it looks like you may not have enough meat, throw in a rabbit or 2 unless you don't like hare in your soup.

The weather in Delano is perfect. Daytime temps are 85 to 95. The temp plummets down to 75 at night, but that's Ok 'cause that's when I'm sleeping. I have not seen a cloud in many days.

Now that the temperature is up, my air conditioner has broken down, spoiling an otherwise perfect week. I'll get it fixed on Monday.

I was almost a multi-milliomaire tonight, but I missed the lottery numbers by only 4. That means I can't buy the Island I had my eye on in the San Juans. Rats!! And I had to cancel the order for my new yacht. Life is so Unfair!!