Sunday, August 26, 2007

M.V. so what?

I am so damn sick of hearing the adventures of Mike Vick. The way the media treats it, you would think he is a serial murderer. Now, I don't agree with fighting dogs. Chickens, yes. Dogs, no. What I am pissed off about is the medias complete and total overkill on a story that should have taken less than 15 minutes to report. A brief diatribe explaining that he was fighting dogs followed a few months later by announcing his sentencing. 24 hour coverage of this event is not needed. The involvement of the pet terrorist group, PETA, was totally unnecessary. I suppose that the media will continue to over kill every story that churns along. Come on guys!! Give it a rest.

As I threatened, I have written and published some erotic literature. My first offerings have scored 12,000 readers in three days. At least one of my sisters thinks I'm writing perverted, dirty slop. She can think whatever she wants. This is, after all a partially free country. I am disappointed, however that my detractors didn't bother to read these stories before passing judgement. If you want to read these terrible, seductive bits of literary tripe, send me an e-mail and I'll be happy to let you know how to find them. Be careful, though, this stuff can be addictive.

Ah, yes, football is back. After several months of sports draught, we have real entertainment again. Have you noticed the way the media keeps trying to shove soccer down our throats? If you enamored of soccer, move to Europe. 98% of the sporting public think that soccer sucks. Given the choice between watching soccer and watching cosmetic commercials, I would go for the lipstick. Soccer sucks.

My fishing buddy back east has said he is 'killing' the striped bass. I sure wish I was there. In fact, I wish I was anywhere where water exists in the streams and fish reside in the water. Such is not the case here. Dry creeks. No fish. An idiotic game department that poisons out the only fishing holes for miles around and then suggests that you drive 60 miles to the nearest rocky, worthless reservoir.

The weather here continues to be good. Daytime temperatures are in the high 90s. No clouds. No wind. Perfect. Delano gets an "A".

I can't think of much else to bitch about. Send your e-mails and I'll send you directions.

dakara

Saturday, August 04, 2007

Roadblocks

Why do RV drivers think it is their solemn duty to stay in the middle lane forever, blocking traffic for miles behind them? Why do truckers just flip on their signal lights and barge on out there, regardless? There doesn't seem to be too much that can be done about it. Here in California, they even tried shooting them several years ago and it didn't change a damned thing. I can't wait until they won't let me drive any more. It is hard to put up with the intense stupidity demonstrated by much of the traveling public. If I could, I'd quit driving right now. C'mon, LOTTO!!

My last blog entry included a diatribe concerning the ineptitude of porn writers. That, at least, is something I can do something about. Yes, your humble slave(me) has decided to write and attempt to publish a few naughty little stories. I have not yet done it, but I'm sure I'll get it done soon. On the other hand, you know that I am one of the great procrastinators of this decade. (witness the lateness of this blog). I'll let you know if I'm successsful and where to read the evil tome.

I still have not heard from my buddy in the east. Either he isn't fishing anymore(unlikely) or his daughters have killed and eaten him.(maybe) On the brighter side of fish stuff, some friends in Kodiak sent me almost 10 lbs. of smoked salmon. Since it was smoked by full-blooded Alsakan Indians who are professionals, you just know it is outstanding. It doesn't even remotely resemble the slop that you buy at the deli for 15 bucks a pound. This stuff is hard, salty and so good it will turn even an old reprobate like me into a saint.(almost)

We're still trying to sell this house. I suspect it'll go quickly when word gets out about the major natural gas deposit that has been discovered right underneath us. Most of the residents of this ugly little village are blissfully unaware of this windfall. They will remain ignorant of the boom potential because most of them do not read, write or speak much English. They can, however, tell you where Tiajuana is.

I think my Las Vegas real estate agent has given up. We just recieve his newsletter once a month now. I must admit he stayed with it a lot longer than I would have.

I am starting to believe I want a new Corvette. My Cadillac is doing a superb job of hauling my fat ass around. It is just that I've always wanted a car that'll do 200 miles per hour. Maybe it will compensate for the drop in velocity of my sex life.

I still don't watch media news coverage. I am very happy with this. Most of my friends who still watch it are in a constant state of agitation. They accuse me of not giving a damn. They are right. I don't give a damn. Aside from scratching off a memo to our two totally worthless senators, I don't participate. It isn't that I don't care. I just don't see how trying to change the minds of two ultra-liberal witches will accomplish anything. A really good friend of mine back east (not the fisherman) always tries to get me interested in the goings on of my old agency, or the feds or anything political. I don't bite on that because I ran my head against the government wall for decades and all I got was a small retirement and an everlasting headache.

The weather in Delano gets an "A+". It has been hot (well over 90) for a couple of months. It feels so good!!

At last!!! Football season is upon us!! Pre-season games start this week. For a while, I thought I wouldn't make it, but here it is. And, the beauty of it is, it's not over until next year!! Months of football. On the baseball scene, Barry Bonds, as of this writing, has not tied Hank A's home run record. I hope he does it this week and then all the limp-wristed whiners can go pout in a corner and leave the real sporting public alone. Once again, the champion crybabies of baseball, the New York fans, are sobbing about A Rod not reaching 500 homers yet. Remember earlier this year when they were crying about him in a hitting slump? As I have said before, New York does not deserve a good team of any kind. The fans spend a major portion of their time whimpering in a corner. Pussies!!!

Well, that about does it for now. If the idiot left wingers don't kill me, I'll write again, sooner I hope. And so it goes.