Californication

There is a minor indication that we may have an offer on this house. That would mean we could move to Las Vegas much sooner than I thought possible. My wifey has started getting offers on assorted items (pool table, furniture, etc.) so maybe she's actually serious this time. Finding a house in our price range in Vegas should be no problem. My real estate spy, Clay, sends me e-mail on a daily basis with housing information. When I have the money clutched in my hot little hands, I'll sail over the mountain and be Californicated no more. Oh blessed day. Oh glorious relief!! Oh, hell, it ain't happened yet. I'll celebrate in sin city.

The other day I sent an e-mail around showing some rapist getting his pee-pee whacked off. A friend of mine wrote me and said he thought that this was the correct punishment for the crime of rape. I thought about that for 3 minutes or so and decided that my friend was right. That way, you don't have to feed some asshole in prison and he can't do it again 'cause he ain't got no pole left. At last, the Moslems got something right.

At last, we have turned on the airconditioner. Months and months of frigid weather appears to be over. The skies are blue again and temps are reaching toward 90. Oh, yesssss.

Our last group of house guests have gone. She left the day after I filed her divorce papers. I don't know whether she went back to the idiot or not. She told me she was going to San Jose, but she left a forwarding address in Palm Springs. Oh well.

I am really looking forward to moving to Las Vegas. It has much to offer. A big lake full of fish. More casinos than anywhere on earth. A great race track. Excellent colleges. But its main selling point is, it ain't in California. If you get the idea that I'm happy, happy about leaving this wretched state, you are 100% right!!

Great days appear to lie ahead. Being the eternal pessimist, I can see several things that could go awry. Maybe, for once, fortune will smile upon me.

And so it goes.