Women and sex!!

You can't honestly believe I'm going to write about women and sex. The longer I live, the less I know about either. At one point, I thought I had the 'sex' part solved, but I've never been stupid enough to pretend I know anything about women. To me, they have always been mysterious creatures who flit in and out of our lives, making us buy houses and perfume. It is likely that they keep us around to supply them with babies. I don't think they have any real use for us aside from stud service. I know they are soft and sweet and usually smell good. They can make us (me anyway) do things we never would have thought of on our own. If our needs are in conflict with their needs, and they almost always are, we are ready to accommodate them regardless of the circumstances. It is entirely exasperating being a male and having to deal with these strange creatures, but I guess we're stuck with it, guys. It's symbiotic. We're screwed.

Except for Dallas winning, I am enjoying immensely this football season. My wildest wishes for Notre Dame are coming true. The only thing the 'fighting Irish' are fighting for is air. Oh, look, they're turning blue! hahahaha. How long will Boston College stay atop the BCS rankings? It almost looks like nobody will be unbeaten at the end of the year. How ironic!! The BCS could turn out to be almost the same at the end of the season as it was at the beginning.

So Southern California is on fire......again. What's the big deal? This happens every year to one degree or another. What's next? Now that the vegetation is burned off, the annual flood storms and mudslides will turn mansions into forty mile an hour racing huts. Will the denizens learn from this experience? NO!! As soon as their mud hills are scraped level, they'll build again in anticipation of the next fire/mudslide spectacle.

Need I say that the weather here sucks? I know, it's an annual event, but it still pisses me off. I wish I was in Balibago again! At least when it rained there, it was warm enough and dense enough to shower in. Monsoon! I loved it. Why don't I go back? I guess I'm just too stupid. The weather here scores another "F".

Just because I haven't mentioned the Muslims, don't even believe I have forgotten them. We desperately need to gather all their little terrorist asses up and get them out of the country. Have you ever wondered what motivates the courts and the politicians to give our country away? I think about that every day. I am absolutely, one hundred per cent, dead ass certain that I'll wind up fighting for my life against them. Our founding fathers must be spinning in their graves. Our government is failing us on all fronts and has since we started listening to the dumb ass liberals. Christ, what a mess!

Another useless, money-sucking holiday is upon us. Halloween. What the hell is it? Why do we have to hand out bags of goodies to undeserving little ankle biters? This year, as always, there will be an assortment of teenagers scattered among the children. Are they really that immature? Yup, they are!

Next month one of the only holidays worthy of note arrives. Thanksgiving!! A godsend for us fat people. It is the only time of the year I can stuff myself to sickness and everyone thinks it's alright. Christmas and New Years are OK, but overdone. The original meaning of Christmas is being lost in sectarian bullshit. Say 'thank you' to our courts!

Don't forget to write to me if you want to sample my humble offerings on literotica. (Yes, that was a commercial, so what?)

Y'all have fun now, heah?

It's cryin' time again!

I wept bitter tears as I watched the thermometer plummeted downward from a toasty 95 to a miserable 65. Once again we are plunging into the horrible, cold, wet abyss that is winter. Will I bemoan this condition until the ides of March? You know I will. Delano gets a big, fat "F" for weather this month.

The Seahawks got beat again, casting a darker shadow on the onset of winter. At least my Okies are back on the winning track. It is hard to believe the unusual twists and turns that college football has taken this year. If I were a betting man, I would be living in a cardboard box. All the preseason top ten picks have fallen. The only good part is that the arrogant sports "experts" have had to eat road apples. It is loads of fun watching them blame a thousand different factors on these events when they don't really have a clue.

Recently received e-mails have confirmed my belief that the only good Muslim is a dead Muslim. If one of those bastards has been born here, educated here and has a good job here, how in the hell are we supposed to stop him? Our gun shops have some pretty good solutions to this problem. Maybe we should all order some firearms before the idiot politicians make it illegal to defend ourselves. We might want to polish off a few illegal aliens while we're at it. Of course, with our limp-wristed, dumb ass delegates, especially the ones here in Californicate, we don't stand much of a chance. Feinstein and Boxer, the worst senatorial pair since Schummer and Clinton, seem to be doing their level best to aid the enemies of this country. Very seldom do I hear of a good decision coming from either of these two utterly worthless politicos. Our judiciary seems to have abandoned us in favor of unconstitutional stupidity. The taxpayers are forced to support the invaders of our country. I am glad that I will croak soon. I don't want to witness the coming debacle.

See what lousy weather does to me? I sends me into a grand funk. I've got to change the subject quick, before I go jump onto the freeway.

At least my literary endeavors are gaining readership. I get a few disparaging remarks, but for the most part, reviews are good. I now have close to forty stories and poems (yes, poems) published on literotica. Writing seems to have a soothing effect on me. The strange thing is, when I start to write a story, I seldom know where it is going. After the initial nudge, it seems to take on a life of its own. I find myself wanting to write something just to see how it turns out. I also find that the more I write, the less porn I read. Maybe I'm just drifting away into old age with no idea about where I am or where I'm going. Probably, I'm weirder than I think.

Well, it's twelve thirty. Time for me to listen to Trish Trang and Koda Kumi. Hiding in music is an obsession. It is so pleasant to just shut off my mind and let some sweet little songstress take me away.

And so it goes.

Plop!

So, there I was, watching Notre Dame getting their asses kicked once again. I laughed and laughed. Then I heard a small, wet 'plop.' Looking behind me, I discovered that I had, in fact, laughed my ass off! I will continue to laugh and they will continue to lose unless they schedule a small town high school team. I must be honest. I almost shed a tear when my beloved Okies lost to Colorado. How does a team that is averaging 62 points a game score only 24 against a raggedy bunch of buffaloes? It seems that every year some misfortune befouls them on their way to the top. Will they lose again this year? It ain't likely. My favorite pro teams are not faring very well. It looks like a long season, but at least, it's football. I must admit that I was heartened by the women's soccer coach's decision to kick the best woman goalie in the world off the team for telling the truth. He did make an unbelievably stupid decision when he didn't play her in the semi-finals. I suspect that she'll be back next year and he won't. The good thing is that the idiot set women's sports back about five years. HAHAHAHAHA!

The weather here has turned foul. Once again, winter has reared its ugly head and destroyed summer. Every year at this time, I vow that I will sell out and move to the Philippines and every year, that turns out to be a big lie. Anyway, Delano gets a big, fat F in weather. I suspect it won't rise above the wretched rating until spring. BOOOOO. HISSSSS.

Another lie I told myself was that I would make it to Washington State to see my relatives this summer. At least this year, I only lied to me.

The more I read, the more I believe that the only way to squash the militant moslims is to nuke 'em. The world would eventually thank us. They are extremely fortunate that no one in power here has the balls to pull the trigger. Turning the middle east into a glass pool would be a deeply satisfying experience. POOF! No more problems.

The democrats are once again proving their abject stupidity by running a moslim and Hillary. Don't they have anyone else? I hope that none of you guys are planning to vote democrat. I don't want to admit that I know anyone that stupid. If you don't want to vote Republican, vote for one of the nut groups, but please, not those two.

Last and probably least, my erotics continues to burgeon and grow. I get lots of positive feedback on my stories. Some of them aren't even erotic.

That's it from the blizzard.